Coffee and Mobsters
by SavannahNicole
Summary: Ulquihime, coffee, and mobsters, of my. :


"Ouch," Orihime said falling to the ground.

"You should watch were your going, woman," a man with brilliant green eyes advised. Of course Orihime was well aware it was his fault, and that he should take his own advice, but still she smiled and muttered a quick apology.

"I'm Orihime Inoue," she said helping herself up from where she had fallen. "Have you seen my package?" She asked looking around at the ground.

Suppressing a sigh and subtly rolling his eyes, the strange man called to her."Woman," Orihime turned around, and saw that he was pointing at his feet. Bending over, he grabbed the box and handed it to the orange haired girl.

"Oh, thank you." She said taking the small box. He gave a curt nod, turned, and left. Orihime figured that was the last time she would see the black haired man, but as soon as he was gone from her sight, she saw he had dropped his wallet.

Ulquiorra had already grown tired of waiting for his lawyer. It wasn't like he had better things to do or anything, it wasn't like he was going to go out and search for wife number four, but anything was better than waiting for that dolt, Ichigo Kurosaki

Honestly, how hard is it to have a woman sign some divorce papers? After screaming at the top of her lungs how much she hated him, and how stupid she thought his clothes were, Ulquiorra just assumed Cirucci would quickly sign the papers and be done with him, yet here he sits, waiting in the coffee shop.

Orihime, deciding she would get some coffee before heading over to the police department to deliver the wallet, was stunned when she saw the strange man, who'd bumped into her this morning, drinking his coffee alone. She began to walk over to him when it dawned on her: He must have realized she had his wallet, called some private eye detective to found out where she stops to get her coffee mid-morning, and is waiting with some hidden mob members to ice her. She considered turning around and running out, but figured that would be too suspicious. So, she opted to just walk over, give him his wallet, and then running out of there like there was no tomorrow. And with the connections this guy probably has, she might not have a tomorrow. Drawing in a deep breath, Orihime walked slowly to his table.

He didn't notice her immediately, but the moment she spoke, Ulquiorra remembered exactly who she was.

"Excuse me," She said cautiously. She paused and after a few moments of silence, he spoke.

"What do you want, woman?" he asked boredly, though wondered why such a clumsy woman was following him.

"Oh, right," she laughed nervously. "Here you go," She smiled handing him the small black wallet.

"Where did you get this?" he asked accepting the object, and eyeing her suspiciously.

"You dropped it," when Ulquiorra just stared at her, Orihime continued. "This morning…when you bumped in to me."She reminded.

"I recall it was you who bumped in to me, woman," he chided slightly.

"Heh, oh, right." She laughed. "So, do you think you can call off you mob friends now? Because I know I had your wallet, but I didn't even look in it, and I was going to take it to the police department so they could give it to you. I don't even know you name, and I won't tell anyone we had this conversation, or any conversation ever, and-"

"What are you babbling about, woman?"

"Um, your…mobsters?" she said suddenly uncertain if he actually had them or not.

"Mobsters?" he repeated.

"Yeah," she said turning a light shade of pink.

"I do not have mobsters," Ulquiorra said mockingly.

"Oh, so then what are you doing here?"

"I'm supposed to be getting divorced," he said bitterly.

"Oh, I'm sorry," she offered.

"Why would you be sorry, woman?" he asked the stranger.

"Divorce is sad. I thought maybe you were sad."

Ulquiorra suppressed a scoff. "You don't know Cirucci."

"Bad?" Orihime questioned lightly.

"Obviously, we are getting divorced, woman." Ulquiorra began to doubt her mental capacity.

"Oh, how rude of me, asking a perfect stranger such a personal question. I'm going to go now."

"Sit down, woman." He mildly ordered. When she only blinked in surprise, Ulquiorra once again suppressed the urge to roll his eyes, something of which he seemed to be doing a lot of in her presence. "You are here to drink coffee, are you not?"

"I was going to, but I thought your mob friends were going to jump out from behind a counter, or they were going to-"

"Enough, woman," he said effectively cutting her off before she started rambling again. "I'm telling you, I do not have mobsters. I could careless if you had my wallet, or if you looked in it. You came to drink coffee, so sit down and drink it." He wasn't necessarily rude about it, but he definitely could have been nicer about it. Knowing it would be rude to refuse; Orihime sat down. After what seemed like forever in silence, Orihime decided to break the ice.

"So, why don't you have mobsters?"


End file.
